Friday, 15 January 2010

Tanzania 'disappointed' at being passed over by an eclipse that passed over the Indian Ocean,

The Tanzanian government expressed disappointment over a Solar eclipse spectacle which showed up in all East African countries but their own.

"Saying we are disappointed is actually a polite way of saying we're angry which in turn is a lesser polite way of saying we're mad" said Mrs. Shamsa Mwangunga, Tanzania's Tourism minister, unconsciously bringing out the polite, hospitable and diplomatic nature of the Tanzanian people at large.

The Solar eclipse which was initially hyped by the country's media to pass by obviously didn't live up. Though scientific co-ordinates argued otherwise and blamed the media, the radio people claimed the pressure was unbearable.

" How do you start telling 38 million plus people they won't see the moon come between the sun and the earth while right in their backyard their neighbours are being told otherwise huh! tell me" said Saidi Bemba a local radio jockey.

" this is a once in a blue moon stuff they only see on tv and newspapers. And the breaking news it will also be sighted in Somalia was not very helpful" he added.

"Our country's location is 6°18′25″S 34°51′14″E / 6.307°S 34.854°E / -6.307; 34.854 and was clearly on the eclipse's flight path i believe" reiterated the Commander-in-Chief Jakaya Mrisho Kikwete quoting some prepared Ministry of Defence co-ordinates.

" what have we done to the moon and/or sun god to deserve this kind of planetary alienation" he added rubbing his eyes with a hankie.

Renowned medicine men had no ready answers either as they said it was too early and even dangerous to consult the Mizimu [Oracles] immediately.

"let their anger dissipate after a while".

      they will have to wait till 3043.Hopefully their legendary patience will serve them well

But word from the Lake Victoria towns of Mwanza and Shinyanga allege it has something to do with the targeted "maltreatment" and/or "profiling" of people of little or no pigmentation.

The government denies these as baseless superstition.

Some even blame the Kenyan citizens for stealing from them this golden opportunity of not only seeing the sun and moon coming together in a tango but the associated tourist revenues in hotel bookings and sale of home made Polaroid eclipse watching sun glasses.

"well, am not sure how they would have pulled it off. Maybe nudge our country slightly to the south east from the Vanga border post-while we were fast sleep or taking a siesta of course, or pulled a string here or there...nevertheless, i wouldn't be surprised to hear our greedy neighbours had a role to play in this interplanetary conspiratory dance" said Balozi Mwapumbu a Clam fisherman in a characteristic poetic prose of the Oysabey[swahili corruption of Oyster Bay] residents,through our translator.

The Kenyan Ambassador to Tanzania denied there was any mistrust or bad blood real or imagined between them and their polite neighbours with whom they share a wonderful common national language and immediately moved to point out the swift progress of integration talks of the East African Community.

"When we become one block of intertwined economies, there will be no losers... really. We get an eclipse, you don't; we're brothers we share"

As reassuring as the Ambassador's words sounded, the facts on the ground remained the same and ordinary Tanzanians will have to contend with the fact they will have to wait a millenium for another 11minutes 3seconds pass, maybe.

The gods will have to throw a dice!!

©2010 newsync

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