Thursday, 17 January 2013

Oppan Gangrape Style

A charitable Delhi Hippie Band is suing Psy  for stealing  their idea for his  YouTube   hit Gangnam style. Speaking  to  reporters in the  aisle  of a commuter train the  group claims the original idea for the song  was sampled   from a single   titled ‘Gangrape Style’ off their yet to be released album  Jugaad .

with the floodgates of litigation open, the Indian government  is suing for breach of this Kamasutra patent
The Album is a parody of their sub continental society and their callousness on many matters including women, the caste system, curry and bathing on the river Ganges.  

According to our reliable sources the group also plans to sue the Korean Pop star for emotional distress and loss of revenue.

Asked why they didn’t release the single earlier the Band blamed government red tape for the delay.

“We had  to be approved by  the Indian film and censorship  board first  and that   meant deleting and/ or modifying some content which they found offensive which   meant we had to go back to the studio”  said Vimal  Ramamurthy.

“In short Psy beat us to it, he got there first and on YouTube it’s all about who gets there first. It seems  like we turned up on Friday for a cricket match that was played on Sunday  afternoon [previous week ]but that doesn’t mean  we don’t own the game” added  Vimal.

Fans agreed but critics asked why now, what were they waiting for all that time.  Their lawyers admit luck was not on their side either.

“ We  were   working on presenting  a  solid case gathering  electronic evidence  and reliable witnesses and that takes a little bit of time then came this….you know, that   bus thing”  their  lead  counsel  said referring  to the gang rape of a twenty  something  college girl in a bus, who later died in hospital while undergoing treatment.

According to their lawyers the  Delhi Band was  reluctant to go ahead with  litigation in the first place  preferring the  release of  the “Gangrape Style”  on YouTube to  go head to head  with the  intellectual property thief ‘Psycho’s’ so lame “Gangnam Style”

“We  figured maybe  if we just download it [on the internet] netizens will see through it and hopefully we will be able to rest  the case on who is the real McCoy and who is the  Joseph  Kony”  said  a confident Vimal  apparently   the defacto spokesperson of the Band.

“But Bam!!   Another 29 year old woman is raped, it’s on the networks and we decide screw   it!! We’re suing.” Added  Vimal.

Pundits and government officials agreed in unison it was a wise decision for two main reasons. Number one, they were screwed   anyways and like most things charity they needed the money badly.
Number two, posting such a potentially viral video like “Gangrape Style” by an Indian group, after back to back horrific headline hogging (f)actual gang rapes had the potential of doing more harm than good.

“ First, there is a chance of Pakistan promoting  it in a bad way, then it goes viral and that  would be a moral nuclear holocaust to our social standing  no matter  how noble the original intention. It would make India look bad. Second, it would be considered insensitive to the families and friends of those affected.  ” said India’s home minister  Sushilkumar Shinde in a statement some noted was sort of misplaced in priority, and paranoid.

As of time of press, the Delhi Band Lawyers were discussing an out of court settlement    following a proposal by the Band dubbed ‘One Pepper Spray  A Lady [OPSAL]”  but Psy lawyers warned on the logistical nightmare of providing more than half a billion pepper sprays in a country 758 times the size of Kenya…and their effectiveness as most new cases were evolving to gang rape style.