Tuesday, 17 November 2009


Nicolas Kim Coppola, the Hollywood star of blockbuster hits like Captain Corelli's Mandolin also starring the beautiful Penelope Cruz, Gone in 60 seconds and many more sneaked into the country in an attempt to escape media attention and visit a Kenyan prison in preparation for his lead role in " End of an Error- rot in detention" a movie written and co-directed by Gado, a famous cartoonist for a local daily.

"The visit caught us by surprise" said the commissioner of police a Mr. Kiraithe. "it's like the Arturs; we didn't know they were in til we saw it in the papers" he said

"They had burnt some newspapers" he added.

"I have a bad feeling the UN had a hand in this"

According to eye witnesses in the high security Shimo La Tewa prison at the Kenyan South Coast Mr. Cage was described as being in high spirits despite the dark cloud of an imminent bankruptcy and IRS lawsuits on unpaid taxes amounting to 6.2million dollars in 2007 and a further lien of 350,000 dollars dating from 2002 to 2004 which many believe is the reason he's losing hair.

"i can't let some stupid litigious Internal Revenue Service guys dampen my moods, ave got to stay happy, am rich, am famous, an A-list hollywood actor" said Cage to the only question fielded to him by the government spokesperson press secretary.

The UN officials, to whom he had been assigned didn't allow him to talk to the media but the government spokesperson's office inquired politely for his real reason of being here.

"we just wanted to make sure no Passats are stolen" a sick joke from Dr. Alfred 'Al' Mutua, the spokesperson.

" why worry when i got my manager[Samuel J. Levin] to blame for this mess and for your information, am suing his ass for a whopping 20 million dollars for negligence and stealing from me" said Cage.

" i gotta go now, got a movie to make".

Sources close to Cage speculated "THIS WAS IT". This was the movie that's going to save him from all his tax problems and possible filing for chapter eleven[bankruptcy], take his family to Tazmania for the new year 2010 celebrations and even buy him back his German medieval castle of Schloss Neidstein which he bought in 2006 and sold in 2009 for undisclosed reasons.

Filming is supposed to start as soon as next week on Monday with much of the 'takes' at Riverwood, the Kenyan version of Hollywood without the beach and the...

let's keep money out of this. Money is a sensitive subject even amongst couples who married each other for better or for worse.

Then the crew will travel down to the Coast by public means for the final shooting.

Riverwood will handle the editing,final production, marketing and hold the distribution rights for the movie.

"this is an innovative approach meant to cut off all the middlemen and hangers on who actually,add no value to the final and honestly,baggage" said Waithaka

Waiguru,only introduced as a Riverwood rep.

Cage described Shimo La Tewa as the "warmest prison in the world"

The movie is expected to be an instant hit especially with former and current political prisoners demography in the country, the continent and Burma.

P.S. I like this guy.First of his act i saw; FACEOFF Kenyan Blogs Webring Member

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