Monday, 5 October 2009

Uncle Bob Finally Allows BBC In Land

In an unprecedented yet, maybe, anticipated move, the Zimbabwean government has allowed the British Broadcasting Corporation back into the country after many years of being locked out, following allegations describing Robert Mugabe as an ape man, early man or a demented old circus monkey or..just something ape like.

According to our reliable sources, bbc reporters reported happenings inside Zimbabwe from neighboring xenophobic Republic of South Africa or, sneaked through Mugabe International Airport -formerly Harare- as British tourists dropping by to have a sip of Zimbabwean beer and take a few snap-shots of the sights and sounds of the breathtaking Thompson falls and magnificent golden Velds, only to end up picking sound bytes from the locals with their well concealed portable recorders. Sound bytes which put Zimbabwe and by proxy Mugabe in a bad picture to the rest of the international community.

These bad pictures varied; from the important issues like not having enough food to eat and what Britain described as the," indespicable, undemocratic act" of beating up Morgan Tsvangirai and his supporters, to the mundane like too much money chasing after too few goods-inflation in layman language- and barter trade.

BBC's Alastair Leithhead who made living history as the first reporter in the country after the 'reporting embargo' was lifted, was flanked by Morgan Tsvangirai, now Prime Minister and shown around the New Zimbabwe. After which he was embedded by Mugabe's personal guards-considered a privilege- to one of his ranches near the Zambezi river where the threesome had a civilized round table discussion [Prez, PM and reporter] on the future of bbc reporting inside Zimbabwe,freely. while at the same time, Alastair being careful not to mention the words 'Whites' and 'farms' in the same sentence.

In an interview with CNN's Larry King, when asked why they had called President Mugabe 'Robertus Mugabeus' in the first place, BBC's director of communications Sir Martin Spinnaker passed it off as a smear campaign by a little known Minnetonka, Minnesota based heavy metal rock radio station WDMQ with it's parent company in the Republic of South America[RSA].

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