Senegalese President proposes new state of Haiti in Africa

DAKAR- Senegalese President Abdoulaye Wade has proposed the carving out of a nation for the habitation of quake stricken Haitians. It still is not clear whether this is meant as a temporary measure or for keeps.

Wade stated he will take his case to the AU for discussion and try to convince member countries to give up some of their hard fought territories to their brothers who are currently as good as stateless.

Though the gesture was seen by many as compassionate and timely,most of the continents cartographers were skeptical of the practicality of such a move.

"We understand the President's motives are for the best but it's easier for him to talk about giving away land when most of that land is, honestly speaking, good for nothing barren desert" said Salif Baghani an Algerian geographical map drafter.

With these kinds of popular sentiment gathering momentum, Senegalese officials were forced to announce publicly they will be giving part of their fertile land too.

                               one hell of a hot piece of real estate


And the international community eager not to be seen doing nothing about the imminent repatriation of Haitians, Japan retrofitted several of it's man made islands for temporary habitation as plans and civil works were underway to construct a single, large island with a capacity of ten million plus.

"This should make our brothers feel like they're home...er! sorry, home is not a good comparison now" said Hichiro Tepanyaki, lead architect of project 'Isle of Many'.

"To make room for expansion at the same time check immigration, the offshore habitat will be as far out of the sea of Japan as the eye can't see" he added.

Haitian President Rene Preval politely declined the offer after a short de-briefing on the town of Kobe.

With international interference out of the way, Africa now stood a better chance of offering a better place for it's own.

" we might be poor with not enough to feed ourselves let alone give away, but we sure are rich in natural resources and that's how we will show we care. We are in it for the long haul" Said AU Chairman Muammar al-Gaddafi who is also the Libyan President.

Indeed, geography the size of Africa with just over a billion in population-the continent sure has more than enough room for one more country.

A proposed site for the Haitian nation in Africa includes somewhere in the middle of the Sahara after it was unanimously agreed the minority Berber tribes still surviving there will be forcefully driven up the dunes.

To make the transition from an islanders way of life to that of a desert warrior thus ensure smooth acclimatisation, Haitians will settle first in the coastal Liberian towns of Buchanan, Greenville and Harper before moving over to Libya and Algeria for Camel ride classes.


©2010 newsync





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Senegalese people mad at statue of half naked woman

Senegalese President Abdoulaye Wade has come under fire from [some of] his subjects for plans to spend  27 million  US Dollars in the construction of a  statue of a man and wife and child with the man statue dragging along the wife statue, or holding her with both arms and balancing the baby on his arm or, walking and the wife following behind; at least  according to the blue prints.

The 160 foot bronze statue of  a physically fit man with big biceps and taking a 'heroic posture'  was condemned by some of the country's Muslims  who make 95 pc of the population as idolatrous.

"Just see the way the 'man' is posing, he's like Zeus about to strike with his thunderbolt" said Cheikh Mamadou Hamadi but his contemporaries thought he looked more like Hercules.

When the designs were redesigned to make the man statue pose in such a way he was holding the woman statue's hand who in turn was  carrying a baby statue, women rights groups protested that it painted women in a bad light and made them appear subordinate to men.

" why is the man statue leading  and dragging the hapless woman along" fumed an angry Ms. Aicha Yunus Taradi. "it's sad to see that women have to walk or pose  in the shadows of men even in inanimate City Square statues" she added.

The statues which Mr. Wade said represents African Renaissance and will attract tourists to the West African nation were seen as a waste of money which could be made useful in other projects like health care and fishing.

North Korean  bronze sculptors from the state run Mansuade Art studio in Pyongyang  numbering about fifty were brought in to help. The government explained they were attracted by the cheap labour and  fears that local people might sabotage the project.

But analysts said  the rare expertise in sculpturing the human  likeness of  their dear leader  was the determining factor.

As the prospects of making real tourism revenues turned from drawing board to reality, President Wade quickly declared through his top lawyers he is entitled to 35pc  of the proceeds of the venture because he owns the  "intellectual rights" for coming up with the idea both business and design; with the rest going to the government.

Papa  Malik Diouf a civil servant  proposed better things could have been done with the money like removing this pile of garbage first

At the time of going to press, the statue was up with the strong man wrapping his arms around his wife and child.

But alas! the Muslims were furious and disgusted by the fact that the wife [statue] was wearing very few clothes thus exposing 'her  thighs'.

The government promised to 'cover her up' using concrete  thus averting  further  protests which might come up in the name of wasting more money as a result the unexpected redesign work

 ©2010 newsync

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